Making sense of the world.
Posts tagged Personal behavior
Beyond Blindness
Sep 3rd
I lay frightfully awake past midnight, gripped by a sudden fear of the possibility of going blind. What
had brought on this fear? I don’t know. Maybe an imagination on overdrive, or the awareness of growing age and deteriorating health. The fear was very real and not nice. It took me to the edge of darkness. I could not see myself coping with blindness. So how did those who had actually lost their sight manage? I remembered seeing blind men with sticks boarding Mumbai local trains. I thought of Helen Keller. Yet, the suffocating fear took time to recede.
Two days later I came across Kanchan’s story.
Blind at Eight
Kanchan woke up and rubbed her eyes. She could hear familiar morning sounds, but could see nothing. As she turned her head around, she saw only darkness. She felt her father’s arms around her as he asked, “Did you dream?” That’s when she screamed out in horror, at the realization that she could not see. “I felt the world closing up around me, as if someone had cut the breath of life,” says Kanchan. Initially, her parents could not believe what had happened to their eight-year-old. They took her to specialists in Chennai, who confirmed the diagnosis that Kanchan had a detached retina; the light-sensitive layer of tissue at the back of the eyeball that sent image signals to the brain had failed. She had become permanently blind.
Tiger in the Woods
Dec 28th
As the curtain drops down on 2009, the tigers of the world find themselves in deep waters. The four-footed ones are in danger of losing more than just their stripes. And a two-footed one risks losing his reputation and substantial earnings. It may be a while before this tiger gets out of the woods.
Both high performing animals preside right on top of the food chain, in the jungles and on the golf course. Great performance, yet facing a bleak future. What got left out of the equation? My guess is character. Lack of it leads to eventual self destruction and hurting others. Like the physical law of gravity, the spiritual law of integrity operates inexorably. Violation can only bring grief to oneself and others. A consequence of the interconnectedness of life as we know it.
And lest we point fingers, for each one who gets caught by his texting habit, there must be dozens who stay hidden and get away. Or think they do. Well, think again. It’s only a matter of time.
India is riding a high performance economy. From a high-growth rate in population and poverty, there is now something of a switch to growing middle class prosperity and consumerism. There are also those who identify another reality: a high-growth rate in corruption. Will a country packed with gurus and religious traditions go over the deep end, or will it develop the character to enable it to soar into the sky?
The answer lies ahead in the decade that follows.
Performance plus character has always been the winning equation.
Wishing you a happy new year filled with great performance and high integrity.
How’s Your Handshake?
Nov 11th
A University of Alabama study indicates that a firm, assertive handshake makes for a good first impression. That may be true for the western world. What about the rest? Is it always necessary to shake hands?
A handshake is a two way street. Similarly with eye contact. Cultural issues are involved and one needs to be sensitive. In Manali, Himachal Pradesh, men are given to shaking hands with men every time they meet, specially among friends. In some tribal communities where missionaries have gone, traditional ways of greeting have been replaced by the handshake, which appears quite absurd. In countries with non-western cultural values, an aggressive handshake or direct eye contact may be unwelcome and may convey the wrong message. It may even lead to trouble.
In some cultures, if a man ‘gazes’ or offers a handshake to a young woman during a religious-public ceremony, the man will have committed a public crime and could be punished. In another setting, offering a handshake to a subordinate of a leader would be considered a ‘disgraceful’ act and would end business negotiations. In certain countries, touching a female, for whatever reason including medical, is considered an illegal sexual act and may invite extreme punishment.
“A firm handshake,” says Alabama psychologist William F. Chaplin, “may provide an effective initial form of self-promotion for women.” He adds that it does not have the costs associated with other less subtle forms of assertive self-promotion. So, a firm handshake is a safe way for women to express confidence while avoiding negative perceptions.