Beyond Blindness

I lay frightfully awake past midnight, gripped by a sudden fear of the possibility of going blind. What had brought on this fear? I don’t know. Maybe an imagination on overdrive, or the awareness of growing age and deteriorating health. The fear was very real and not nice. It took me to the edge of darkness. I could not see myself coping with blindness. So how did those who had actually lost their sight manage? I remembered seeing blind men with sticks boarding Mumbai local trains. I thought of Helen Keller. Yet, the suffocating fear took time to recede.

Two days later I came across Kanchan’s story.

Blind at Eight

Kanchan woke up and rubbed her eyes. She could hear familiar morning sounds, but could see nothing. As she turned her head around, she saw only darkness. She felt her father’s arms around her as he asked, “Did you dream?” That’s when she screamed out in horror, at the realization that she could not see. “I felt the world closing up around me, as if someone had cut the breath of life,” says Kanchan. Initially, her parents could not believe what had happened to their eight-year-old. They took her to specialists in Chennai, who confirmed the diagnosis that Kanchan had a detached retina; the light-sensitive layer of tissue at the back of the eyeball that sent image signals to the brain had failed. She had become permanently blind.

The parents put their grieving daughter in the Calcutta Blind School. After a year at the school, “I came to terms with my blindness,” says Kanchan. “I decided to break free.” She began to accept what had happened to her. She refused to give in to self-pity or despair.

She joined the Girl Guide program and rediscovered happiness. She trained in first-aid, fire-fighting and tent pitching. She learned river-crossing in the mountains and went rock-climbing and trekking. She successfully completed the four-stage Girl Guide course along with others who had normal eyesight.

Kanchan passed her secondary school exams, coming first among the handicapped students in the state.

Fingers that See

Kanchan joined the Darjeeling Institute of Mountaineering and became an ace-mountaineer, an activity where eyesight is considered as an essential. One by one, she scaled the peaks and discovered that her blindness was a boon. She learned to ‘see’ with her fingers. She had no fear of height or depth since she could see neither.

The young woman scaled the Tenzing Rock, the Gambu Rock and the Sandakfu. She won the Best Girl Guide medal in the state and qualified for the national meet. In 1994, defeating 600 competitors with normal eye-sight, Kanchan won the President’s award.

The President of India is the chief patron of the Bharat Scouts and Guides. This organization is affiliated to the International Scouts and Guides, with the Queen of England as the head. In 1997, Queen Elizabeth invited Kanchan to an international Girl Guide event in London. She would compete with the best from around the world.

The event included climbing the difficult Harrison Rocks, abseiling from a 150 feet high tower, rappelling down rocks, and river-rafting. Kanchan did all that and scored to win the Best Girl Guide in the World Award. Presenting the award, Queen Elizabeth II remarked, “I would not have believed Kanchan’s story had I not seen her perform with my own eyes.” She hosted a dinner at Buckingham Palace in the 24-year-old blind champion’s honor.

Kanchan’s story did not end there. She went on to do law and IAS.

Blessings and Possibilities

God has been good to me, as he is to everyone. I’m past fifty and have only recently started using glasses. I read, write and edit, to put bread on the table and because I enjoy it. Without eyesight what would I do? Blessings we take for granted.

Perhaps age and failing health is a merciful reminder of who we are. Something we are apt to forget. With all our technologies and all our knowledge, we have not changed, and unlikely to change. Born helpless, we grow young thinking only others get old, move into middle age desperately denying the reflection in the mirror. We color our hair, tighten our paunches and hide the wrinkles. We invent philosophies and theories to evade the truth.

Instead, we do have the option of acknowledging and being at peace with our limitations and handicaps, and going beyond it. To discover and live out the awesome possibilities to which we are often blind.